Killzig's Kiddie Pool
November 11th, 2001
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Disclaimer: All of Killzig's ranting / raving is not necessarily the opinion of everyone else at DAC, so don't blame us if Killy's writing gets you all hot and bothered. Blame him!
X-Boxes, GameCubes, and Playstations oh my...(or, Killzig gets fucked over by marketing--yet again)
So most have you have probably noticed I've switched to a once every two weeks format for the kiddie pool. The reason for this is simple, business is slow and I've got better things to do. That being said, I'd like to take a look at a couple of different things this week. First off, consoles and the impending Nintendo VS Microsoft fued.
Let me tell you guys right off the bat that I'll be the first person sitting at home laughing at the guys standing in line for one of these toys. That's right. I'll be sitting at home on my nice cozy couch with an ice cold beer in hand while you're out mid-November in the freezing cold waiting for a over priced piece of plastic. Consumerism isn't anywhere near as blatant as it is in the gaming subculture. In my short stint in the MMORPG world I noticed one thing, no one ever talked about the game they were joining together around unless a dev was present. In the Everquest/AC chat room they were talking about Anarchy Online, in the Anarchy Online chat room they were talking about Horizons, Dark Zion and DAOC (which is probably the best offering from the bunch considering it's the only one that's materialized.)
Point is, we're always looking to splurge.
We'll throw money at it no matter what it is. No matter if your playstation 2 already has nifty graphics, a dvd player, and a wide selection of games. We'll still drop 300 bucks on a new box. Not only that, we'll take an incomplete product. One controller, no games. I remember the last console I bought. Know what it was? A Nintendo, the original, remember those? Remember what it came with? Super Mario Brothers, Duck Hunt, 2 controllers, and that nifty orange gun I cut the cord off of and used to play space invader.
And if I remember correctly I only paid somewhere in the vicinity of 100 dollars...that's definitely more for your money. With that I was able to pop the damn thing right out of the box, play it and invite a buddy over to play too. You can get the X box with 2 controllers and a game though it'll cost you nearly 200 hundred dollars more. At some point we should be conscious of the fact that they're doing the damndest they can to take as much of our money with giving us as little as possible.
To me, this is where the gaming "journalists" should play some role in thumping the idea into all of our heads. We're just as guilty as the whole shiny package insta orgasm symplex as you guys are. That's the problem. We're more like accomplices to the game/console developers than we are to the actual gamers. Which is where our loyalties should be. Because in reality, we're gamers too, even if we act above it most of the time. We pay fifty bucks for these games too and are just as pissed when the shiny package insta orgasm symplex wears off. It sucks...hard. It's really a pain in the ass to blow 50+ bucks on a game that's not finished, or 200+ bucks that you're going to have to spend another 100+ bucks on just to use, but why aren't we on your side?
Advertising money? The fact that the developers are the ones controlling the entire flow of information? Or is it just that we want to get the goods for free or work alongside those developers?
Probably all three. No, scratch that, definitely all three. Then again, maybe I'm too cynical...maybe developers are gamers just like us. Or maybe Microsoft, Sony and Nintendo have to charge 300 bucks for a console or else their little companies might flounder. Who knows?
Not that anything I say really matters, we'll all still pay whatever price they set, no questions asked. Accept anything new by a big company as unquestionably good and go about our merry ways. Not that these "luxuries" are really so good for us. At least heroin makes you feel good after using it right? No, I'm not encouraging drug use (alcohol's not a drug, I swear!) I'm just saying, you'd think we'd get some sort of reward for our addiction. Sex addicts, alcoholics, workaholics, they get much more of a reward than game addicts do.
We just give and give, hopefully someday this won't be the case. For now though, I'm off to go camp at Best Buy and grab my X-Box. Cause just like you guys, I'm weak and I'm also a junkie...a cynical junkie, but still a junkie (which means I'll give my cash and bitch about it afterwards.)
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MAIL BAG!
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Killzig,Do you think you are clever using "F.U.", Feargus' initials, to refer to
him?I know you guys blame him for everything, but I don't think this is called
for.Silverdawn@RPGPlanet
Hi Joost!
It's great to hear from you. Did you enjoy your vacation? Hope everything's well.
Joost, about your bitching... If you bother to even READ THE POST linked in the news item he is quite at peace with the forumites calling him F.U. it's just a nice little personal touch. Keep things friendly :) ... not to mention F.U. is a lot less offensive than FEARGUS URQUHART... that just sets my palette ablaze by the third phoneme. Oh and there is that little odd quirky bit that they're JUST HIS INITIALS AND YOUR FILTHY MIND HAS PERVERTED SOMETHING SO INNOCENT.
And no, we don't blame FU for everything... marketing is the cause of all the world's problems... cancer, aids, oprah winfrey. starvation, overpopulation... all of it is because of marketing. Don't worry, we here at DAC have a very clear view of things, we love Feargus! We love him so much we would even let him impregnate us for the sake of having little Feargi that we can tattoo the gamespy logo on! See. I can work with marketing too! After we're done with that we can go over to Spain and paint over the Guernica with a funny episode of Penny Arcade!!! w00t, that's l33t!!!
In any case, if anyone should have a problem with it it should be Feargus. If he wants me to call him King of The Toilet Warmers let him tell me himself. Until then, I'll continue to use the common names associated with F.U., Feargus, Gus, El Presidente, etc et al. Thanks for your concern, and keep up the good work at RPGP. XOXhugsandkissesXOX
totally count me in.Argh! TURD DREDD that's great. DROK! (Read the comic book)
im thinking mabye a signature pic of judge dredd only with opra's face were
dredd's should be. and me name will be 'T.U.R.D. DREDD'cheers and keep up the good work.
peter nini
Hell, Yeah. Interplay had better get another Fallout out or they're going under... It's the only license they have worth a crap these days.Yes, let's see how BGII:DA does though. *Deep Breath*
-Max
That's scary. Anyone notice that Britney is dressed like Elvis in the promos for her HBO concert? It's the FAT ELVIS suit, I wonder if she's trying to tell us something...Thats right.
We arent really making the world a better
place to live for others when we buy our
backstreet boys, our Nike`s and our Gap`s.
People make this shit for a dollar a day in
Indonesia or something and the big companys
selles it for tons more than it is worth in the
western world.I thaugt this wasnt the case
in the gameing industry, but i was wrong...
With the apperance of Fallout Tactics ,
Interplay fell into the rotten festering pit that
is commersialism.The joy i had playing the
Fallout1 and Fallout 2 games had
vanished.
I think the ones who think Fallout Tactics
is the best game they own, are most likely sitting with their
Nike sweater on, listening to Britney Spears latest
album and have American pie in their movie Shelf.
Well you can live with the comfort that you are
destroing that world for ever........
Long LIVE KILLAN
You my good sir are one of the
wisest men on the face of the planet.(Well not wiser than Dalai Lama)
I never knew....
Please read my responce on "i want to stab you with sometihing rusty"
Lars From Norway
Hey, Lars, that's 2 in a row. You don't have anything better to do man? I know it's Norway and you're probably under 30 feet of snow (unless maybe you live in Oslo) but couldn't you prepare some nifty Potetskrell's or something? Anyways, I'm glad you think my column is dritbra! keep up the e-mails.
Hello.Killzig I am Darrell Porter.I have played all the Fallout games and I have wanted to get in touch with the people that made it.And get on there good side,Do you think that Fergus would let me talk to him?How do you think the best way for Fallout 3 to start would be?FOT was ok but not great! I think that the start was Shity.Darrell, nice to meet you. If you want to talk to Feargus you have to look no further than the Black Isle Boards (http://feedback.blackisle.com) he's a frequent user over there and always happy to answer questions from gamers. He might give you an answer to something you didn't ask but it's an answer none the less. Ideal FO3 start for me? Go back to The Inkspots (immediately signaling that the series is coming to a full circle) which song? Probably "I don't want to set the world on fire (i just want to start a flame in your heart)", get away from the whole save the world from great evil scenario and throw us a bit of a curve ball (or just throw the curve ball then introduce saving the world a little later...) Maybe it's the hormones but I'd think a dark romantic comedy-ish story line would work really well in the Fallout universe. For the most part the main character in the Fallout universe has been something of a loner so knocking mr. rigid callous emotions on his heals with a pretty little ghoul has many interesting possibilities. The thought of it alone sets me into giggle fits and thinking about the different options he could go into. Getting back to the e-mail though, you're right the FOT intro was definite shite. I thought I was loading up Fallout Cassidey Kart Racing.
Bravo! You speak to the masses when you write,I strongly agree! ITS TIME FOR A SHAKE UP
How do you find out this stuff? Do you work at Interplay?
Usually, I find this stuff from paying way too much attention from message boards but yea, I get the occassional whiff from an Interplay employee or two. No, I don't work at Interplay. No...God, no...
Thanks to everyone who sent me mail, I couldn't work you all in but keep at it, maybe you'll be insulted too!
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