The Army Diary

Koki · Post by **Koki** » Mon Jul 09, 2007 8:23 pm

Goddamn two pages and we didn't even start

zzz

Megatron · Post by **Megatron** » Tue Jul 10, 2007 12:11 am

365 days to go. thats at least....365 pages :O

kashluk now has a shaved head and has been running around all day in mud. just before resting his head on a pillow of rocks, he is woken up again and has his possessions thrown onto the floor and pissed on by someone who isnt even in the army. why did he have to be optimistic, DAMMit

Goretheglowingone · Post by **Goretheglowingone** » Tue Jul 10, 2007 12:29 am

i say defect to russia and joint there military.

or

go defective and make your own military

Thor Kaufman · Post by **Thor Kaufman** » Wed Jul 11, 2007 7:38 pm

Um bongo

GUNS

S4ur0n27 · Post by **S4ur0n27** » Thu Jul 12, 2007 12:50 pm

Thor Kaufman wrote:GUNS

qfe

Kashluk · Post by **Kashluk** » Sat Jul 21, 2007 6:58 pm

Date: July 21st 2007

Progress: 4 % (349/362 days left)

Rank: Recruit

Situated at: 1st Separate Truck Company, Kuopio Battalion, Kainuu Brigade

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

So here we are. A little less than two weeks ago I entered the brigade with
excitement and fear of the unknown. They took us rookies into a large movie
hall where they called us further, in alphabetical order, to receive our
first orders - telling us to go where we would be situated for the next
eight weeks.

I was a bit surprised to hear that I was chosen to the 1st Separate Truck
Company (1. ErAutoK for short), since a lot of guys actually go through a
lot of paper work to get there and still won't be accepted. That's because
almost all guys serving here will get a "heavy truck" / trailer lorry
driving license as their war time assignment is to drive around all sorts
of heavy military land vehicles, excluding tanks. If a war would ever break
out, most of us would end up being under the supply officers' command, since
we'd be busy enough trucking around ammunition, fuel and troops to the front
lines. Yay.

About the actual army life: they say the first morning is something you will
always remember. Bullshit! I've actually forgotten it already. The first week
is something I will remember forever, though. The corporals (the lowest rank
of squad leader) can be a real pain in the ass. They are just like us, only
that they've been here 6 months longer and that's why they're such assholes.
We actually had an argument with a few of the most annoying ones, which then
eventually transpired to our unit's senior lieutenant who made it clear for
them that such bullshit would not be tolerated here

Pretty sweet. Made
some powerful friends already.

I lost around 10 pounds (5 kg) just during these two weeks. It's not that
the stuff we do would be in any way incredibly physical, but we spend around
14 hours per day on the move. No matter how much you eat (we get three warm
meals per day) it's pretty impossible to gain weight at this point. Later on
things will get pretty easy and that's when a lot of people actually manage
to grow a big belly.

We train firearm handling and exercise shooting a lot. I guess that has
something to do with our unit winning the championship of the northern
national defence area in assault rifle shooting last year. The commander
wants to renew the bonuses he earned from having the best shooters, duh. So
we went and fired blanks once and moved directly to the firing range to
practice with live ammunition. I managed to pass the first phase of the
shootings with a score of 95 / 100. The first phase consists of ten shots
fired in your own pace to a target 150 meters away (around 500 ft or so).
I got five bucks from the lieutenant for being the second best shooter in
the company. The best guy had 96 pts, the bugger

So far everything's been pretty good, especially now that the corporals have
finally calmed down and given us some slack. I'm actually enjoying my short
army career. We wake up every morning between 5 and 6 AM, run around, learn
stuff, sweat a lot, eat a lot and go to bed at 10 PM. On good days we even
have some free time, depending on the schedule, sometimes even as much as
two and a half hours. We have drillings daily, "atteeeeen-hut!" and stuff
too. So it works pretty much the same as in the movies. Our sergeants are
pretty cool, though, it's the lieutenants and captains that yell at us a
lot and ask what our major malfunction is.

Next week we'll begin our combat training by crawling in the woods, testing
our gas masks by entering a tent filled with tear gas and learning all sorts
of silent / non-verbal signals used in the battlefield. It will most likely
be pretty rough, but I think, in a way, it could be fun as well. In three
weeks we also have our soldier's oath and after that we're no longer recruits
but military drivers with the rank of a private. Wo-hoo and we get to wear
these shiny ding-a-lings on our sleeves. Otherwise things'll stay the same
unless I get in to the NCO or Officer School, where I've applied already.

But anyways, my next holiday is next weekend, so I'll let you guys know
more then. I hope I'll get some photos soon as well. Stay tuned.

Megatron · Post by **Megatron** » Sat Jul 21, 2007 7:35 pm

i must be finnish special forces or something because i walk 4 miles a day and sometimes skip breakfast :hardcore:

airsoft guy · Post by **airsoft guy** » Sun Jul 22, 2007 2:01 am

Only two weeks in and they've already got you practicing marksmanship? Ivan must be stoking his boner for your Motherland, Patriot

Watch your cornhole, unless you're into that sort of thing, erherherhehrehrer.

Mechanurgist · Post by **Mechanurgist** » Sun Jul 22, 2007 2:29 am

Kashluk's still alive? I thought for sure he would have been eaten by the meatgrinder on the Eastern Front by now. What's the attrition rate in your unit? How many prisoners did you take in the first two weeks?

airsoft guy · Post by **airsoft guy** » Sun Jul 22, 2007 3:24 am

Mechanurgist wrote:Kashluk's still alive? I thought for sure he would have been eaten by the meatgrinder on the Eastern Front by now. What's the attrition rate in your unit? How many prisoners did you take in the first two weeks?

He's clearly a superior specimen of Finnish Super Soldier Genetic Engineering. Eight feet tall, biceps as big as a moose, and chainguns surgically grafted to his balls

Mechanurgist · Post by **Mechanurgist** » Sun Jul 22, 2007 3:28 am

Norwegian moose or Canadian moose? They also sent him to Mexico for special training with young boys, and that t-shirt is proof against m-radiation!

Kashluk · Post by **Kashluk** » Sun Jul 22, 2007 7:06 am

airsoft guy wrote:Only two weeks in and they've already got you practicing marksmanship?

Like I wrote in my diary entry, the unit's commander has a heavy focus on marksmanship, since he's desperate to win that championship again. Although one of my friend served in the border guard detachment and he said that they fired live ammo on the second day. Basically their training went like this: 1) everyone learns to hit the target, once they do, no more trips to the firing range 2) raising physical condition 3) learning survival in the woods. He said that after their basic training period of eight weeks they only went once to practice shooting.

And to all you gun nuts around there, we're using RK62s, which is basically a polished version of the famous AK47. It fires 7.62x39, has a 30 rnd magazine, it's around 1 meter long and weights around 4 kilos. My gun looks like this:

Our NCOs have the latest version, RK95, which has all kinds of funky goodies that don't exist in our service rifles. I got a fairly new rifle, it's manufactured in 1983, but some guys in our units have rifles made in the early 1960's.

airsoft guy wrote:a superior specimen of Finnish Super Soldier Genetic Engineering

6'1" tall, 200 pounds, biceps the size of a thin squirrel and continuous itch in my groin

And no, it's not crabs, it's genetic engineering all the way.

Post by **Dogmeatlives** » Wed Jul 25, 2007 6:11 am

Me want one... smuggle one to New Jersey. I'll see that you're handsomely rewarded. How does 10 bucks sound?

PsychoSniper2 · Post by **PsychoSniper2** » Wed Jul 25, 2007 10:40 am

Kashluk wrote:testing
our gas masks by entering a tent filled with tear gas

As someone thats allready done that ............ let me just say you'll love it.

Its not that bad while your in it, its mainly just annoying as fuck cause it incapacitates you for a bit as your sinus's drain compleatly.

Tho I really feel sorry for the guy in my platoon back when I was in basic, his mask didnt work.

He was an hero.

VasikkA · Post by **VasikkA** » Thu Jul 26, 2007 3:39 pm

Vroom vroom.

S4ur0n27 · Post by **S4ur0n27** » Thu Jul 26, 2007 5:27 pm

Vasikka, when are you going?

Koki · Post by **Koki** » Thu Jul 26, 2007 7:44 pm

So you shoot on your second day and focus on fighting in woods.

Fucking finnish elves

S4ur0n27 · Post by **S4ur0n27** » Thu Jul 26, 2007 9:02 pm

They'll cry then the Horde comes, eh?

POOPERSCOOPER · Post by **POOPERSCOOPER** » Thu Jul 26, 2007 9:21 pm

This makes me want to join the army, but with our army you have to stay in a bit longer

Thor Kaufman · Post by **Thor Kaufman** » Thu Jul 26, 2007 9:38 pm

yvan eht nioj