What do you do for a living?

POOPERSCOOPER · Post by **POOPERSCOOPER** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 5:18 am

Neon Dingo wrote:W00t, I got paid today.

Yup, I get paid $5.15 an hour to make toast.

It's time for me to find a new job.

Anyone have any advice for a 17 year old High School senior looking to get a decent part time job (over minimum wage)?

I sent in applications and completely random places and got nothing back.

First off get rid of the mohawk, and any punk rock shit you wear. Go to the nearest grocery store and stuff bags, easy money.

ExtremeDrinker · Post by **ExtremeDrinker** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 5:21 am

Speaking of stuffing bags.....Prostitution is a victimless crime....Much better money, too.

Neon Dingo · Post by **Neon Dingo** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 6:46 am

First off get rid of the mohawk, and any punk rock shit you wear. Go to the nearest grocery store and stuff bags, easy money.

Coincidentally I got rid of my mohawk tonight. It was too much of a hassle to maintain it. Lots of people liked touching it. That pissed me off.

Also, I don't wear any "punk rock shit."

Grocery stores, I've tried that. Wal-Mart is full of 50 year old laid-off tech support workers and the Albertson's workforce is filled to the brim with white trash NASCAR fanatics.

Prostitution wouldn't be bad, especially if I could get AIDS.

In conclusion, the only options left are a life of crime, prostitution, drug dealing, or martyrdom.

Hammer · Post by **Hammer** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 6:49 am

Come to me and I'll hook you up with some gats.

Doyle · Post by **Doyle** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 7:23 am

Have you tried selling blood yet, Dingo? You could sell blood or plasma and make enough money to get drunk on.

ExtremeDrinker · Post by **ExtremeDrinker** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 7:25 am

I get an extra $25 when I give plasma because I'm all beefy and beer soaked...My plasma is like gold. In a good week, I can get about $150 or so for my plasma.

I'm looking to sell a beer soaked kidney...Any takers?

Doyle · Post by **Doyle** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 7:28 am

Damn, that's some pretty good money. Can you do that every week or do you have to wait?

ExtremeDrinker · Post by **ExtremeDrinker** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 7:30 am

You're supposed to only do it once every two weeks, I think...But you can get away with going to different places if you live in a big enough city.

Doyle · Post by **Doyle** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 7:31 am

Time to start selling the bodily fluids.

Hammer · Post by **Hammer** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 7:33 am

I always wondered, if you go to sperm banks and say you have problems jacking off, does a hot nurse do it for you?

Doyle · Post by **Doyle** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 7:36 am

Hmm... Do sperm banks pay you? It would be nice to get paid to receive hand jobs from a nurse.

Hammer · Post by **Hammer** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 7:37 am

I'd make it my full time job if that was the case.

ExtremeDrinker · Post by **ExtremeDrinker** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 7:42 am

Sperm banks pay you if you've got a heafty enough load for them...A buddy of mine went to sell his sperm last month..He was turned away because his sperm count is super low. So low the chances of him knocking anyone up are "slim to none"...His fiancee cries everytime he tells this story..Funny stuff.

I'm all about selling bodily fluids..Don't even need a job if you've got enough stuff in you.

Hammer · Post by **Hammer** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 7:45 am

By load do you mean amounts of white fluid or amounts of tiny people in the white fluid? I have lots of white fluid but I never took the time to count the tiny people.

ExtremeDrinker · Post by **ExtremeDrinker** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 7:55 am

Gotta have enough "glimmers in daddy's eyes" to sell it.

Hammer · Post by **Hammer** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 7:57 am

Oh ok. I think my baby making factory is on strike so this plan is out the window.

Viktor · Post by **Viktor** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 10:39 am

Hammer wrote:I always wondered, if you go to sperm banks and say you have problems jacking off, does a hot nurse do it for you?

No. You get issued a sample container and some porn and it's off to The Onan Suite to harvest the love custard!

NachoMonkey · Post by **NachoMonkey** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 11:06 am

Damn, im 18 and all I have to do is stand down wind of a teenage girl to get her pregnant... and ive been doing it at home all this time FOR FREE !!!

ug, I'm a part time pizza delivery guy for dominoes, i get 9.50 Au an hour plus another 1.50 each delivery and tips so i cant complain there, i drive around a lot.

Tank · Post by **Tank** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 2:03 pm

Sperm banks here require a massive amount of sperm-cells, just another 1 million and theyd've accepted me... So now I go to school and have a free-time job at a gasstation, the worlds most boring place (lousy pay, but hey- I get to do my homework when there aren't any customers!)

~Tank

Jimmyjay86 · Post by **Jimmyjay86** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 3:24 pm

Dingo probably the best job to get which doesn't depend on how you look is a construction laborer. Just as long as you show up and are willing to put in some hard physical labor you can get paid pretty well. At least $10/hr, maybe more. Otherwise landscaping work, cutting grass, etc is always a good choice. There are usually los of large companies looking for dependable people. I would rather work outside than in a store or fast food place any day.