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Gimp Mask
Mamma's Gang member
Mamma's Gang member

Joined: 18 Apr 2002
Posts: 3994
Location: cool running B)

PostPosted: Thu Feb 04, 2021 6:39 pm Reply with quoteBack to top

OK time for another community interview, it's been far too long since the last one. This one is a classic Triple B interview: it's all about Babies, Boobs and Butts. This guy has a trophy display case chock-full of DAC's Breeder of the Year awards and for a good reason. The reason is that he has made a lot of babies. So getting to interview this stallion of a man was not just a privilege, it was my civic duty. So bend over and spread your buttocks ya cucks, it's insemination o'clock with none other than the mighty Mismatch.


Gimp Mask: You have four children. Which one is your favourite, and which one is your least favourite? Don't give me some bullshit answer like "they're all equal", surely that can't be true.

Mismatch: I'd say the one who is best behaved at the specific point in time when the question is asked. Kids are basically assholes if they think they can get away with it. I suppose empathy and such things are developed rather late because survival of the fittest and all that. Yeah, I'm just making shit up now. When humans are that young I guess the benefits of cooperation and such aren't important yet. Tho' I suppose that it might just be MY kids that are assholes. I'm not ready to rule that thesis out just yet.

GM: Your structured family life seems the complete opposite of mine, and it all sounds kind of hellish if you ask me, just like my life would surely be equally hellish to you. It's kinda hellish to me too to be honest but whatever. Anyway, did you always dream of having a big family or was it something that just kinda happened? You had a pretty rapid insemination schedule so I imagine it must have been planned at least to some degree. Or are you just a reckless maverick in the sheets and a titty hound on the streets?

M: Well. Yeah. I don't know.
At some point we decided to have one, and well... I guess we just kept going. I'm not going to be one of them guys telling everyone they should have kids because... cute... cuddle. But once you do have them well... It's a challenge. Forces you to grow as a person as well. Things get real and you need to step up, you need to become a rock to lean on. For me what I enjoy with kids is the fact that it forces oneself to be something more than you were.

GM: You had a vasectomy after the fourth child. Did you have any complications? I wouldn't mind having my tubes tied but I've heard some horror stories so I've been just rolling the dice for now.

M: Naah, they saif I'd need painkillers for a week. But well. I went and had it done on my lunchbreak, went back to work, and worked the rest of the day. Then just kept on going to work as usual, but stopped with the painkillers after the first day. Some say pain is just weakness leaving the body. I'm more of a pain feels good kind of guy. So regarding complications. I think that was more common back in the day when it was a bigger procedure. Now they're just opening a small hole, fish the tubethingies out with a special tool, and burn them. So it's not as big a procedure, tho' I think the risk is way smaller than back in the day.

GM: You must be pretty busy with the family stuff and all. How do you find time for gaming, DAC and other important stuff? Do you play games much these days, besides chess with the DAC chess club?

M: I quickly realized that the chessplaying was quite hard, I wasn't focused enough. I do play games, but I prefer them to be quick and easy to start and stop. But I do get a few hours in each week. Them kids need to sleep. Before we got the fourth one I used to get up early on saturdays and syndays (6:00 ish) and take an hours by myself, but well, babies get up early so that slot is gone.

GM: I hear you like tits. Which kind of tits? I like them big and round and firm, big areolas are a plus.

M: I think most tits have merit. I enjoy tits and I'll not be writing any tits off without viewing them. You never know when you'll find a winning ticket, so you need to look at them all.
GM: How would you rate your wife's tits, on a scale of :subhuman: to Spacecat?

M: She's had 4 children. Their best days have passed, but hey, I'm happy they're still there.

GM: How about butts, are they of any importance to you? There was a study that said that men like butts because on some primal level they actually remind us of tits. Or maybe it was a scene in The Office and not a study. But there's even a scene hinting at it in An Andalusian Dog.
Have you seen that film? I didn't care much for it.

M: I have not seen it.
But I do enjoy butts. They need to be fit though.

GM: Speaking of films, what is your favourite movie? You could also list top 3 or top 10 or whatever if you can't pick just one.

M: I know I should andwer something like Apocalypse Now, 2001, Groundhog day or something similar.
Maybe I could have gone with Ghostbusters. Amazing. But there is one movie I keep comeing back to and I'm not quite sure.
Trading Places. I fucking love that movie. Not sure why, but there it is.

GM: What is your most memorable DAC memory?
How about the least memorable one?

M: It's probably Megatrons spacecat thread, with pictures and his account of how he showed it to his teacher who called it a health hazard or something along those lines.
I don't remember.

GM: I've always felt like DACers are pretty politically aware people on average regardless of their political leanings. Either that, or they're just Dunning-Krugering like the rest of the Internet and I'm just too dumb to realize it. Anyway I've noticed you've shown interest to politics, on DAC at least. Do you feel like the world is going to shit, and if so / if not, why? And as a parent, how do you feel about the direction the world is heading?

M: We do have some issues on a glabal scale. China is probably the most obvious one. Their ability to play the long game makes it impossible for democracies to deal with them. I think the western world must agree on a common hard line china policy and stick to it. The EU needs to smart up on both their china policies as well as their immigration laws.
I do think we'll see some sort of large mailitary conflict in the next 20 years, but who knows, maybe we'll go all Chamberlain again.
But well, I'm not too worried in the long run. The thing is people in general are decent (except for chinamen, they're fucking assholes) so things will likely be ok in the long run

GM: Have you ever been to jail?
Would you like to?

M: No, not really, but when I was in colledge I made like 10$ from volonteering to stand in a lineup. So we were like a bunch of scrawny students and then the obvious villain who glared angily at the window.
Not really, but if I had to I'd like to state that my perceived gender is female.

GM: What would you like to change about DAC, and what sort of direction should the site as a whole take, or would you prefer things to stay as they are?

M: There COULD be more active members. Like 20 or so. That'd be enough.

GM: How many pairs of tits would you say you have fondled (skin-on-skin, bra stuff doesn't count) over the course of your life?

M: oh... wow. good question. I drank a lot when younger so my memory is a tad hazy. Somewhere around 10? That seems a tad sad. Should be higher, but I was rather young when I met my wife. Yeah THAT must be why it isn't more amirite?

GM: I dated this girl for a bit and when I finally got to fondle her tits they were like two plastic bags filled with sour milk, it was awful. I stopped seeing her soon after. Do you think it was the wrong thing to do? Personally I think it was the right thing to do, it was the worst pair of tits I've ever encountered and I'm not even that picky.

M: Unless she was breastfeeding ther shouldn't be any milk in there. Had she had kids? Sounds like mommytits. I suppose you could ger the same thing if you loose weight rapidly?
I need to look into this.

GM: The best pair of tits I ever fondled were perfect, but she was terrible in bed and also boring as shit. Still I dated her longer than the sour milk bag girl, who was actually pretty smart and funny and sweet. What would you have done?

M: Terrible in bed isn't good. You probably did right. I'd pick an ugly chick who takes it up the ass over a looker who doesn't every time.

GM: If you could enforce one rule on the forums, what would it be?

M: Make DaC Great again?

GM: Whatever happened to Mismatch's Corner of Angst? There are three possibilities: either you're not angsty any more, or you're not Mismatch any more, or DAC has no corners anymore. I wonder what the density parameter or DAC is. Perhaps this place is as flat as Earth itself. Better ask Taluntain. Yeah so anyway what happened?

M: haha, wow. I honestly have no recollection of that whatsoever. But It's my writing style, and sound like something I'd write. Especially with the poetry. That was possibly the most gay thing I've read in a while.
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