How do you meet people?

Posted: Sun Jul 29, 2012 8:05 pm

How do you guys meet or how did you meet your friends? All my friends are kind of going in different directions and I didn't make many friends or participate a lot in extra curricular activities at college so my friend base is pretty small.

Help me make more friends DACK.

Posted: Mon Jul 30, 2012 7:28 pm

In Soviet Russia, friends meet you.

Posted: Mon Jul 30, 2012 7:52 pm

Mostly at MLP meetings.

Posted: Mon Jul 30, 2012 8:41 pm

Roommates and neighbors and friends of theirs. Easy.

Also, your FLGS may have some people you can hang out with, depending on your hobbies.

Posted: Mon Jul 30, 2012 8:50 pm

I don't anymore. Pretty much isolated myself to this room with this computer, I hate people, for the most part.

Posted: Wed Aug 01, 2012 4:47 am

I'd love to help you with this, as apparently I've got something; at DefCon, a group of my friend's friends pointed out to me that although they earn six figures income and have grown very successful in every other manner, I was the only one present that had the skill of approaching strangers without hesitation and the open nature to get them as a friend by the end of the conversation.

There's a very simple logic, Pooper, if you wanna make new friends. The world and the people in it are a mass of scary things. Just about every other person is just as intimidated about it as you are. The trick is to either not, or learn to pretend not to be afraid of it. Follow that logic, and you are one step ahead of the rest.

Don't try to meet absolutely everyone you cross paths with. Only those who you find yourself sharing a space with (i.e. a bar, a bench, etc) for more than a minute or two. And don't force it. Just have a casual opener. If its not too tacky for you and you find you like it, you're welcome to borrow mine--

At every conversation with random strangers this last week in Vegas, I reach out my hand with a smile and recite casually, "Wyatt Manoil, damn glad to meet ya." Even if you aren't going to talk for more than a couple sentences, it lets people know that you welcome warm interaction and thus far for me, it's gotten nothing but positive responses.

Hope some of this helps. Can definitely talk more about it if it does.

Posted: Thu Aug 02, 2012 3:56 am

Go to a public rest room and just wait till someone uses the stall next to yours. Wait till they start peeing and then introduce yourself and offer to shake hands. Guaranteed way to make a life long friend.

Posted: Thu Aug 02, 2012 4:56 am

I take it those bulimics you like throwing money at aren't cutting it ? Ehue. icon_drunk

Posted: Thu Aug 02, 2012 5:11 am

No, I just don't talk with them that often. Too many people, too many places. Gotta adapt.

Also, you come to find that making new friends opens a helluva lot of new doors. If I can get a better understanding of coding (which he says isn't difficult so long as I complete everything at codeacademy), a new friend I met through an older one offered to hire me on at roughly $70k out in Orange County, CA. I'd prefer to be making that much here, at home, so I don't think I can really take him up on it, but the fact that I'm being offered rather generous solutions to life's current troubles by new friends is kind of telling of socialization's invaluable nature. Having read that sentence back, I probably should have rewrote it, but I won't.

Nonetheless-- it's good that Pooper is conscious of the problem and asking questions to try and beat it. I can't imagine how many live with poor social skills regardless of how conscious they may be of an improvement's necessity.

And Blargh, come on-- you know I don't have any money.

Posted: Thu Aug 02, 2012 5:22 am

Usually at the park or on the street. But as for advice I don't really have any for I only hangout with people on occasion and I don't really remember how I met them. But Manoil's advice sounds good.

Posted: Thu Aug 02, 2012 6:27 am

I had no idea that we had another feeder on this forum. Fascinating. icon_drunk

Posted: Fri Aug 03, 2012 2:12 am

I appreciate the responses so far but I think I need help in ideas of how to meet people. I do probably need help being better in social situations when I'm with people that are friend potential but as of right now I'm not meeting enough people to even do better at that.

I work at a small business with people not in my age group and my current friends don't get together much anymore since they are branching out. This kind of leaves me to be on my own which makes it much more difficult especially when I'm out of all the easy friend making places like college.

I did see some website called "meetup" but it seems like a lot of them are for older people or the younger 20's people just aren't active with group meet ups.

Posted: Fri Aug 03, 2012 2:47 am

Take night classes, do social/community work, play a team-based sport, join a band, do group hikes, join demonstrations/a religious cult. Or go the Fight Club route- develop testicular cancer by either finding a nuclear plant and rubbing your johnson against a cooling tower (it may take a while) or be a bit of a dick and just plain lie and then join a support group. Just stay away from the Marlas.

But who needs new man-friends when you got cam hos and wine coolers? icon_drunk

Posted: Fri Aug 03, 2012 3:16 am

Have you thought about volunteering? I know that's a dumb idea, but it does get you out and meet new people. Just find a cause you quasi like and there's probably a volunteer group related to it.

Posted: Sun Aug 05, 2012 7:57 pm

Volunteering is actually a great idea.

All friends outside of university circles have come from different volunteer organisations. You just need to have an excuse to hang with people, experience some ups and lows, share moments. Usually works best when you don't force it, just let things happen.

Posted: Mon Aug 06, 2012 2:14 am

I thought that was called getting older dumb

Posted: Mon Aug 06, 2012 3:58 am

Take up a hobby that involves being out and about, preferably with others. Stuff like learning a language, being in a band, maybe some martial arts mumbo jumbala, whichever. Most towns have some kind of noticeboard advertising groups, you can always give them a whack.

Sharing a house with someone can be good but it also can be absolutely terrible, and not in the terrific sense.

I've met most of my friends either through other friends or being drunk and confident like a boxer as seen in the film 'raging bull'. Though going alone to parties or bars or gigs can be a bit of a downer for both yourself and others unless you have a force majeure personality like manoil I guess so dont do that maybe, or do, who knows.

Otherwise just invite yourself open to conversation. People seem to talk to me all the fucking time because I look like a chill guy. If you try to be alone in public by reading a book or trying to do a crossword you are pretty much guaranteed to be approached by someone. It's also worth having a whacky little gizmo that people can ask you about to fill in any conversational voids. Generally a conversation with new fools is best when you give them a few different paths to go along as seen in a 'choose your own adventure' game. also probs get a facebook, smile a bit and remember to listen to what the other person is saying than worrying what youre going to say next.

- megatron speed dating guide 2011

Posted: Mon Aug 06, 2012 3:12 pm

you need a cellphone, too, since it seems it's everyone favorite way of communicating now

which is why i mostly hang out with my chidlhood friends nowadays.

Posted: Mon Aug 06, 2012 11:25 pm

mostly i tend to send things to other planets

icon_drunk

Posted: Wed Aug 08, 2012 8:35 pm

Sports. Lower league football (soccer) should do the trick. Good party tradition as well.