Fallout: A Hard-on related story about hard-ons

Posted: Fri Apr 16, 2010 1:06 am

After the oil rig blew up, Billy, along with his mates from vault 13 headed for Arroyo. On the way, he fell through a portal. It was blue.

He woke up in a magical weird place. Frank the Fierece Fallout Phallic Friend appeared from a bush and said "hi Billy, welcome to Harrys Happy Home of Humongous Hard-ons". As Billy looked around, he noticed there were hard-ons, everywhere, and that his incredibly long named greeter was in fact, a hard-on. This made billy feel wierd, and he ended up with a hard-on. He didn't like it, so he tried to find a way home, trapsing through the land of hard-ons, across the hard-on plains, through hard-on mountain, under the hard-on battlefields (where the hard-ons were fighting againt the invading boners) through the hard-on tunnels until he reached hard-on city, a giant hard-on, inhabited by hard-ons. The chief hard-on gave billy a quest. It seems a gang of boners had stolen the hard-on chip, and without it, the giant hard-on would cease to produce the neccessary hard-ons for the hard-ons to survive. Billy collected his gear from the hard-on shaped locker (granted, most of the gear consisted of hard-ons), and headed for Boner Camp. When he arrived, he fought the boners, killing them with his overwhelimg hard-ons. He picked up the hard-on chip, and returned to the hard-on to the hard-on city. The chief hard-on was impressed, and rewarded billy with a group of muscular hard-ons who would guide him out from this shitty place, however, there was a time limit "I fear this joke may soon run out steam, you have only one more paragraph left, after that, the readers will no longer tolerate this gibberish and seek other means of a fine hard-on".

So Billy was about to cross Erection Bridge into the land of Fallout, until!!! PEW PEW PEW SPLOOSH! A giant virti-boner, piloted by Captain Hardcock was firing strings of Prick Seed at Billy. The muscular hard-ons, and billy, goruped together, and with the hard-on might, fought the pesky bastard away. So yeah, Billy crossed the bridge, rubbed one out, and woke up. It was a nice day, maybe it was just a dream? Oh no....morning wood!!

The End?

Posted: Fri Apr 16, 2010 4:00 am

Snake is going to sue over this unauthorized biography.

Posted: Fri Apr 16, 2010 4:09 am

Posted: Fri Apr 16, 2010 4:42 am

Needs more sex

Posted: Fri Apr 16, 2010 9:34 am

Or is it?
Waiting for a drumroll + sequel.

Posted: Fri Apr 16, 2010 4:42 pm

that was a hard read

Posted: Sat Apr 17, 2010 4:22 am

Too legit to quit Hyuk hyuk

Posted: Sat Apr 17, 2010 9:20 am

not gonna lie that was a pretty shitty story.

Posted: Sat Apr 17, 2010 9:48 am

Good alliteration and sentence structure..i especially loved the part about hard-ons...keep up the good work..i forsee a pulitzer...maybe a caldecott in your future
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caldecott_Medal

Posted: Sat Apr 17, 2010 10:44 am

I don't get it.

Posted: Sat Apr 17, 2010 1:51 pm

Oh that's just great. Thanks for spoiling it asshole.

Posted: Sat Apr 17, 2010 6:37 pm

That story made my nipples hard.

Posted: Sat Apr 17, 2010 6:48 pm

this reminds me of the Styx song- Too Much Time on My Hands.

On the plus side, though, Insane Lark's nipples are hard icon_clap

Posted: Sun Apr 18, 2010 1:46 am

So...what did you guys think? icon_chew

Posted: Mon Apr 19, 2010 5:14 am

I thought it was pretty creative.

Posted: Mon Apr 19, 2010 12:02 pm

i didn't read it but i think if i did i probably would